Time Flies! Doesn't it?

I never realized that it has been so long that I have had a urge to sit and write here... It has been awhile since I have anything to say that was not said before I guess... the sadness of my lose is still heavy on my heart and there are many morning the first thoughts are of my mom and that is okay... there are still things that happen that remind me of her and a tear comes to my eyes and that is okay as well...
I am starting or have been for that last week preparing the house for Christmas... leave a lot of the stuff in the containers this year... adding to what I have especially outside... Roger and FLo's moose was repaired this year and is on the front lawn... I went out and bought Candy Canes that light up and gift boxes which got Carl in gear with his ideas... our tree came out of the box and was put on a stand and is outside so that the gift boxes has a place.... I also did some plastic canvasing this year for outside... a big Merry Christmas which I have finishing making but not put out yet... I need some lights which surprisingly enough ran out of this year....I finally got decorations around my back door which I love so very much... and is there picture to go with all of this... yes there is but they are also still in the camera... we loved the real tree last year and we are doing it again this year... can't wait to go get one...and it will be back in the basement since it seems that is where we spend most of our time... and enjoy it more there then the living room.
I have not been doing a lot with the camera in the last months... forgetting it home is a reason behind it...
I have done a little bit of Christmas shopping but today looking for some photos to finish off one of the gifts I actually got two more while looking through them... I didn't find what I was looking for but I did find a lot that I need for later... namely the Christmas past wall... which has been moved this year... from the sitting room which went back to a bedroom... it will be in the porch so everyone can see them as they enter the house... it is not started yet.. that is my project of the day if I could get off this computer...
We were over to Plaster Rock last weekend with Dad... it was a wonderful trip and I can't wait to go back again... it is terrible that it has been so long in between trips there...
My little family in Moncton has been sick so I have not been down there in the last month... I am sure Caleb is grown a foot and when I go in the next time he will not know me...
Well I hear things going on downstairs hoping that someone is making breakfast since I have been up for almost 4 hours and have not eaten yet...
Have a great Sunday all... nice talking to you all again... Joanne

Time

5184000 seconds

86400 minutes

1440 hours

60 days

2 months

That is how long you have been gone

from our lives...

And damn we miss you so very much

Love ya Mom

As the sun came over the trees while I was making tea this morning I thought of mom not like I don't every morning.... it was funny because I crawled out of bed about 3 this morning and wondered why I would be up and fully awake at this hour... only it took me 3 more hours to realize what it was about... I thought I was doing really good recently .. the tears were less and my heart was not hurting as much but this morning all it returned in full force... think it is time for me to go and do something because if I stay here it will be a day of tears and heart ache...

Joanne

My Day

New Brunswick Day.... not PEI day... Carl is back to work after a week off to spend it with Kyle...which was a good week for them I think... Monday Craig showed up... and now he is gone as well.. off to start another adventure in his life... Matt showed up on Friday... so the weekend was of the boys and their friends... I have to say the house was full ... to end the normal weekend.. Matt made dinner last night and we had Pa over ... which he always enjoys...

So Carl left around 5 this morning... I was up shortly after.. got a few things done and then thought what the heck am I doing... I am alone and working when I could be out of here... actually have been thinking of Jill this week... she will be home in September... should go out looking for some new places to take her for photos... So that is what I am going to do... take a totally I am not doing anything I don't want to do... I am going to go where I want to go though a darn good shopping trip would be good as well but the stores are closed so that is saving me some money today... LOL... I am sure Carl is happy to hear that one...

Get a movie for tonight and pick up something instead of making it... so that is my day for today... tomorrow I have a list as long as my arm to get done around here... a week with everyone home makes for a house that needs cleaning... and that can wait until tomorrow...

Have a wonderful day all Joanne

Saturday

Here it is 2:30 Am and I am still up and with no interest in going to bed at the moment... we spent good part of the afternoon and evening at our friends Richard and Theresa's ... it was sunny, windy... then we had a great down pour for about 15 minute just enough to almost ruin dinner but it didn't... Richard and Carl did the beer drinking thing...we had a great dinner... they had mackrel with steak and salad I had steak ... and by midnight we were home once again .. he is sound asleep at the moment with the two dogs next to him... actually there is no room in the bed from me until I get he dogs off... I know I am going to be feeling this in the morning but then there is not a lot that has to be done tomorrow so why not pull a stupid thing off tonight...

Up date not saying how great I am but the little monsters are disappearing very quickly.... and more then I thought there was... but I am winning this fight thank you very much LOL...

Today was a lazy morning maybe that is why I am not sleepy at the moment... I actually pulled off a 10 AM sleep in today... then started our day with the market missing out on fresh eggs again this week... got dad down for his weeking wash down as Carl calls it... then off to see what kind of washer and drier Normand had in mind for us... it was pretty good because Monday afternoon it will be parked in my hall until Carl comes home to hook it all up and there will be no more running to dad's to do drying visa the drier or clothes line... I will be a very happy woman I have to say...

There is nothing all that wonderful going on... I did spend some time on the beach with my camera tonight and when I went looking at the pictures tonight after I was finished I realized that there is almost 400 photos on the camera... one of these days I will take them off maybe I should have not bought the 4 g memory card... I would take them off more often.... but then I am trying to see how many pictures a 4 g actually can hold... I know little things amaze me... but then if I was going out more often with my camera I would find out sooner he he...

Dad and I were suppose to be heading to Plaster Rock next week but Dad put it off until the Fall saying it was really too hot for travelling... so it will be the fall before we head that way... but I am still looking forward to a trip to see all my relations over that way.... and Jill is coming home in September and mentioned she would like to come so maybe we will wait.. I just think dad is not really crazy driving with me... but I am a great highway driver... really I am.. he he ...

Well think it is time for me to find something that will make me go to sleep... I do have a book somewhere in the house I started to read maybe that would do the trick... it usually does most time...

Have a good one all... Joanne

Jo Is On The Trail... Where Are You?

I am not a mean person... I have never wished deadly harm to any one or anything in my life... I have called some people names ... namely my brother Roger for the last 2 years but 99.99% of the time he is asking for it .. because he is what I say he is with me...

The last couple of weeks I have been actually doing spring cleaning in the house even though it is summer... it was not done.. and when something comes around after all my hard work and messes things up that is enough for me so tonight is the night... I am on the War Path....

Those who know me I have mentioned many times that I am here I have had unwanted visitors in the house.. the so call cute little kind... the ones that love cheese and peanut butter but they got smart and stopped coming to the traps so I went to something more serious the glue traps and let me tell you I have no sadness in my heart when I open a cupboard or a drawer and find one in the trap... in a bag and out in the garbage it goes... so don't bother with the ohhh poor little thing... I don't want to hear it... and yes I if I could find where they are coming in ... that would be the end of it.. but then I wouldn't be sitting here writing this tonight ...

So this week it was the kitchen I decided to clean the cupboards.. and since I am done with the large crowds at the house I actually decided to pack some of the much loved dishes from the cupboards into containers... leaving one set extra out instead of the 4 sets I have in the cupboards gathering dust and dirt and then I would have to clean them again next year or in 6 months when the mood hits me... but I went into the cupboard looking for flour one morning and discovered that the 4 legged monster had ate a hole through the bag... so out it went... the cupboard was a mess.. with all the flour and its waste... clean that up looked for the extra plastic containers.. and off I went ... then the next morning I went in and discovered that since the flour wasn't there for it to play with the night before it got into my cereal... so a slow burn started to show.. grrr my cereal the only one I have almost every morning... but no .. cleaned it up ... put a trap out and went on my way...

Yesterday morning I went in to get my cereal again that I actually was smart enough to put in a plastic container... and discovered that it was back that night and what a hell of a mess it made.... to a envelope of Side Kick... sooo I cleaned it up once again... moved everything into another cupboard thinking that it would be harder for it to get there... and went on my way until tonight... after dinner I put some broth from dinner on my glasses and I went to wash them... and went into the drawer to get a tea cloth.. my new ones that I really liked and discovered the little (not a nice name placed here) was in the drawer... actually I almost grabbed it... and no Yvette I didn't yell and jump on the chair because of it... a few more choice words came out of me and that was it .... it was either me or it.... I had picked the clothes to wash them and discovered it was tearing them apart to make a nest.... I don't think so

The last time I was out getting these traps I bought 4 boxes.. and each of them has 4 little traps in it and as of now there is 14 of them tucked around my kitchen... bedroom because Carl said it was near the garbage can last night... think it was the empty cheese stick bag I throw in yesterday from the dogs... and in the spare bedroom because it seems they love the bottom drawer of Great Nanny Melanson's Buffet... and all my table clothes which are at the moment in the washer... want to guess what is all over them...

I still like my Kraft dinner once in a while but this time I will not be eating it .. I went to each one of the traps and sprinkled a little cheese over each one... resist that one you little monster...

The next stop will be rat poison I am not playing around with these things any more... I don't mind animals in my house as long as they eat out of the appointed dishes... go out to do their business and stay out of my stuff....

I am sure Carl is going to have one heck of a good laugh when he comes in to see the red in my eyes and why it is there...

Off I go to finish up cleaning the cupboard once again and check the traps.. maybe I got lucky...

Happy trails guys... Joanne

A Busy LIttle Sunday

It has been bloody hot around this place and the only place I want to be is right here with my 2 A/Cs going keeping me cool and comfortable... but this afternoon Carl dragged me kicking and scream from here to go visit some friends at the beach... like that would be a cool place... in reality by the time we leave it was very much so... by the time we finished dinner the tide changed and so did the weather... it became windier and colder... to the point we actually talked about going into the trailer...

This morning he didn't have to say too much... when it came to going out for breakfast... the Atlantic host and Eggs Benedict here I come.... then off to Dad's for a while... in the line of who goes where Church I am third... Flo usually takes him but Pat will if she is around and if neither is around it is me... so this morning I had the pleasure of going to church with day ... a little visit to mom on the way home...

I also found out today that I have no allergies to bee stings.... I was driving with the window open and something I thought hit my hair... Carl said not but after dropping him off to pick up his jeep at dad's I was on my way home when something came a crawling on my shoulder and when I went to brush it away it stung me... darn those things hurt....

We also think that we have a lady to take the dogs... we have been looking for someone for a while now... I just don't think it is fair to them when I go out and they get put in their kennel... and they are there most of the day if I am gone most of the day and most days I still am... Linda a woman looking after Carl's parents has a mother who has one of them and it is dying... and is looking for another one to replace it... and asked if we knew any one with one... she said that she will take the two of ours... I know that they are going to a good home... and that makes me happy... they have been great company when I am home... but it seems I am not home all that much ... and when I want to go away for a few days I don't have any body to look after them...

Well I just got up for a bit and now it is going on an hour... so think it is time to head back.. have a good one all... Joanne

Mid week

Wednesday already... two more days Carl will be home for the weekend... now that is a nice thought...

They have been working on Dad's house this week... well last week as well but never mentioned anything about it... they painted three of the four bedrooms and the hall way ... something they were talking about for a while... then out came the forsaken rugs upstairs... they have almost three of the rooms done... only Pat's room and the hall ways to do...

April (if anyone didn't know is the lady that comes in 5 times a week for 3 hours with dad) and dad are still going out each and every morning ... Roger always makes sure there is something on a list to get while they are out... so he gets for his walk... which is helping him all so much... now saying he is going to do the one minute dash soon but he is moving more easily in his walker...

I finally finished up something for Roger today... when we were painting the porch I had a big WELCOME at th top of the window... and it had to come down... the only thing was that it was almost the same color as the porch so I was thinking of doing one in a differen color until Roger started calling the porch his offie... that is what I made... in plastic canvas... welcome to Roger's Office... looks kind of cute...

I found some yarn in my boxes some time back and thought of making some sweaters for Caleb... and I am almost finished the second one and working now on the third... they are larger sizes since he is leaving one size at a blink of an eye... so larger sizs from now on...

Anyone on facebook has read that at the end of the month Dad and I are going to Plaster Rock for a few days... He has been wanting to take this trip for some time... so I thought it would be nice to take it with him... it will also give me some alone time with him... since there is so little of it around the house... there is alwas someone around when I am there... or like this morning no one but workers... they were all out doing their own thing...

Peter and Pauline are in town for a few weeks... I see Peter the first part of his vacation but since Pauline has been here they have been travelling around the province doing their thing... and why not they are on vacation...

Well that is about it for tonight ... just a short one.. nothing really going on ... have a great one Joanne....

Dealing With The Last Month

Did I fall asleep and forgot to get up because tonight while I was sitting here doing my bills I realized that it is a month today that mom has been gone... In the last month I have seen her in the kitchen window I don't know how many times... as I came into the porch because most time that was where she was standing looking out watch us there... I miss getting a hug from her... but with that thought I also think how many time she would ask why so many kisses and hugs... and I would always answer that I needed to get lots of them stored up because if she goes away I will have them to keep me going for a little while... well sadly to say it didn't work...I believe that all those hugs and kisses were used up to get me through saying good bye to her...

I have places a photo of mom and dad on my desk top.. so each morning when I turn my computer on... they are the first I say good morning to and most nights to say good night too... Flo had taken one of mom after Dr Boucher removed skin cancer from her cheek that I loved... she sent it to me... that is on the wall next to the computer... then I have a frame with two smaller photos of mom and me and then one of Patsy Ann kissing Dad ...

I had to have some recent photos of mom and dad because the ones that were on the stairs were really old ones... I have gone through almost every photo I have here looking for pictures of mom... and most of them I have cried over and tried to remember why they were taken... more tears....

I pass the grave yard every day and the few times I have gone I have left red eyed and sadder then I was before going up.... so now I just pass the grave yard and give mom a little wave and I love you ...

I think of her every day... missing her every minute... wish that for a moment she was here... and then cry because of it....

I have survived the lose of my husband... I have survived the lose of my mother in law... and I know that I will survive this lose in time... but I am still counting the days that she has not been in my life... the moments I would think mom would have liked it or smile at the reaction to something that she didn't like...

The other night I went up to the house and sat in her chair almost half expecting her to come around the corner to claim it back.. but she didn't and as I drove home I thought of it again and walked into the house red eyed ... I am thankful for having a very understanding man in my life...

I wish a wish
that will never come true

I dream a dream
that is impossible...

I hope
knowing that all the hope
will give me no results

I still see you waiting there
I still hear your laughter
and see the tears...
I see your smile
and loving look
I feel your hands on my cheeks
or on my neck to warm them up
Your arms as they go around my neck
saying hello, I missed you, where have you been
why has it taken so long.

I see, I hear, I feel them all
but they are all from memory
no matter how much I wish,
no matter how much I dream
or hope or pray

You are so missed ...

Spring has Pased but Still Here In This House

When I was a good mother and a good wife... and that is some time ago.... every spring while the boys were off to school and the hubbie was off to work I would spend my days for weeks cleaning the house... something that was once called Spring Clean...washing walls, cleaning Windows... getting the drawers and closets fixed up for another season... I am sure there is some people that actually still do it... I have not for a very long time ... usually the only time there is any amount of cleaning around here is when I am tired of a room and have decided to re paint it... and that has not been for a few years...

Then last week I walked into my bedroom looked at the room and said out of surprise to myself this room needs a spring cleaning... smack me upside the head and tell me that I am crazy.. but almost every time I came into the room I said the same thing... yesterday it came close I almost got the bucket and rag out and started but decided Transformer 2 was more interesting then doing walls, windows, fixing things up in the room... well the movie couldn't have been all that interesting I had a nap instead... and since I am a morning person to do things... not saying that I am a morning person, person but just like things that I have to do in the morning... by the time I got up from my nap it was too late to start it... though when I am alone at night and get it in my head I could be doing house work at 2 am as well... I am crazy that way you know...

So this morning while I was playing farmtown on facebook... yes ladies and gentlemen I am addicted to the program.. what can I say... any way I kept looking over to when the air conditioner was which was right behind my head which is way not good for me to be sleeping with... I knew I had to move my bed which in itself is a job... so if I am going to move the bed why the heck not... and down stairs I went for water, soap and a rag.. and actually washed down the first part of the bed room... curtains are in the washer.. bedclothes are waiting in line to get their scrub down and everything else has been cleaned...

I have a few cubby holes up here and to my amazement I found some things that I received.. like the wonder album box that I got from Rebecca and Matthew a few years ago for my birthday... and never got around to doing anything with it... when Robin announced the coming of Caleb I was in the storage area looking for two things... Hoppy (you remember him Robin) and Lise ( which was a teddy bear that Lisette gave to Robin when he was younger) . They were to be washed up and passed on to Robin for the baby... well wish what I found them this morning.. maybe they will get there for the next one... I also found the candle lamp that I bought on one of my outings with Yvette which I just put on the floor to keep it from getting knocked over, kicked it and it is not in pieces in the garbage.. duh me... and 1/2 of the pages for the cook book are on one of the shelves on my night stand.. maybe that should be the next thing I get done around here... would make hundreds of sheets disappear really quickly...

Well that is what I have been up to for the last while.. just trying to get through the days... I do drop in to see mom once in a while.. not every day can't take that ... motions get the best of my when I do.. but when I have something to tell her or some news she is one of the first to know about it... dad is doing okay... he has some very rough days but he is getting through it... not sure what the 29 of July is going to be like for him.. but we will get through it like everything else...

I do have to say belated Happy Birthday to Danie.. I do hope it was a good one... I thought of it before I got on the computer and it disappeared again... something I didn't write down to remember...

Well have a great day guys I am off to see if I can get the rest of the room done this morning or it will have to wait until morning again.... left the worst for last... the computer side of the room...

Joanne

Going to Be A Nanna Again... WOW Fast huh!!!!

So now that it is official... I can say something... like is there any fun in that... there is also a correction on one of the last blogs... Rebecca`s little bean is not the youngest of the great grandchildren... Amanda`s bean is... And I am going to be a grandmother again and to think 2 years ago I didn`t think I was ever going to be one...

So like I have always told the twins the oldest you learn from ... the second and third in my case you correct your mistakes... so this time I am not going into the baby knitting nutty thing... I am still working on three size 4 sweaters for Caleb... so until I get the second official word from Robin and Amanda (because the last time the first one was wrong) as to what the baby is I am not going out and getting yarn of any kind or picking up anything for bean number 2...

The blog that was started this morning:

I was just told it was the first day of summer...Wow I thought the first day of Spring was not that long ago... Up until today for the last few months time seem to be going way too slow for me...

While waiting for my car to get its check up I thought I would start the blog... the last week has been a roller coaster of emotions... and it is not stopping very much... one minute all is great the next minute Carl is wondering what he did to get me going again... the poor man has had to put up with all of this... thank God he is a good man....

I guess I start it off in the morning because for the longest time I would get up and as I am getting my glasses to move around there always have been a thank you for allowing me to get up to face another day and that my mom and dad are still in my life... now for the moment it is thoughts of mom... and how I miss here.. but throughout the day I do thank Him for having my dad still here to help me get through all of this... and most days when he comes back with April I am there to say hello with a kiss and a hug and steal a little talk when no one else is looking...

Yesterday was Father`s Day and as usual this family gathered together ... Flo made a awesome seafood chowder for the family... and Pat made a wonderful egg white (bird nest) dessert.... Of course none of us over ate at all.. ya right that would be a first.... thank God there is not too many of those gatherings... there would go my weight again... ohhh wait it went any way... back on watching what I am eat today... There are photos of the day but I didn`t upload them yet... but I will and put them up for all of you that was not here... then after lunch I had to go home to pick up dinner for Carl`s family... Flo making lunch a surprise Carl and I ended up with seafood twice yesterday... I made a seafood lasagna... rich food kills me... good but to top the dinner off Susan made a homemade ice cream cake very good, very deadly and I paid for it last night....
I actually think it was all the rick food eating that did it..

Carl is back to work today ... but not far enough for him to be away... so he will be home at night time...hmmmm which actually means I have to be home to make dinner for him.. .now that is a change... me making an evening meal... that doesn`t happen all that often when he is away....He took the week of mom`s death off... and then last week he had off because the work he does was not ready for him actually if it was not for another department of his office he wouldn`t be working as well but they had a job up this way and needed his help.. thank you very much... but that was not why I was writing about him.. it was last week I wanted to talk about.. I had not even finishing up last year`s plant removal when all of this started and in the mood I was in was not planning on doing it for a while... but Carl went out and got all of that fixed up... tilled and weeded all the flower beds for me... and must more around the yard...So when people tell me that my flower beds are great looking... I have to be honest about it all and say thanks to Carl they are... I bought two lamb`s ear plants and only got one planted... so you know the garden is out the window as well this year... we picked up some tomato plants and actually put them in the flower beds... because if you leave it up to me to water them all the way down the lawn they would never survive .... they do have a chance up this way ....So Carl is back to work and I am going to have to get backside in gear and keep up the flower beds... not sure if it going to happen but there could be a change... just need to force myself outside a few times and I should be back to my old self... what ever that is...

Well the blog I wrote this morning has about 10 more pages but I am not going to bore you all with all the details maybe another day... have a great one... tomorrow I am painting... will post photos ... Joanne

Some Healing Time

As promised but like usual late...

Master Costa... is the youngest of the Great grandchildren he is Monique youngest child...

And Nanna Vet who has so little time with him because he is in Montreal and she is her in New Brunswick took the time with him at every chance she had....

And this little one... and I am not talking about the one is the peach... the green ladies and gentlemen I am very happy and proud to say is my first grandchild... Caleb... as like Vet I have had very little time with him... but things are going to change on that one...

Caleb and Costa... not pleased that they are out of Mom/s arms but together...

Danie and Papa (when Danie comes home there is at least one photo of them together)

A kiss for you

And a kiss back to you...

Hey I want in on this.... (Lise)

Of course there is more munching going around here...

And as usually Danie has her little chat with Papa....

I need to correct something here.... Costa is not the youngest great grandchild attending this gathering... the youngest has no name.. nor face or sex... the bean is still growing in baby girl.... though Aunty is hoping for a little pink one... we will take what we can get and love it as we love all the grandchildren and great great grandchild...

As I said in the beginning of these blogs the gathering that day was out of sadness but I hope there was some healing through out the day... even if it was a little bit... because it was so great to see all the family together gathered in honor of someone we have loved for so long and even today as I sit here trying to type miss her so very much....

Now some people may think this is nuts but I am going to tell you any way.,... my mom is buried by the road... which Roger noticed and was very pleased about... because for many years mom use to sit in the front porch watching everything and everybody go by... often wondering who they were and why they were there...and more often sat in the porch or stood by the window of the door watching and waiting for the jeep to come back home when dad was out doing something always worrying that something might have gone wrong.... we placed some flower on her gravel this week... because she always loved flowers and often came out to weed with who ever was out there weeding.... and yesterday I placed a small humming bird feeder in the planter in hopes that one or two hummers will stop by to visit with her when we are not there...

One more thing that mom loved and we will never be able to do with her again was to touch... she loved it when someone was holding her hand... (which dad did for most of the day in the end) giving her a hug... or a kiss... and each day I go and sit with her... hoping that a hand cames out so I could just touch it once more....

The tears do flow very easy at this moment and I am sure they will for a very long time.... the pain no the emptiness in my heart is very strong at the moment... and it will be there for a long time I am sure.... but the one thing I will always be thankful for is the time I took to spend with my mom even when it was just to sit for 5 minutes to hold her hand, rub her feet or just lay (or is that lie not sure) my head on her knee so she could run her fingers through this mess of hair...

Session is done thanks for listening... Joanne

The Day After We Still Can Smile

Through the past week many tears, many memories come across our lips as we thought of our mother who passed away quietly on June 6, 2010 after 87 years of life... though her life was long our lost was painful and we miss her so very much....

Today was one of those says that mom would have called a perfect day... the sun shine, the warm was perfect and a slight breeze to keep the black flies aways... well almost all away...

So Carl and I went down to the wharf and picked up almost 100 pounds of lobsters... and spent most of the afternoon cooking them ask the family slowly came to gather at our homestead.... and some of our neighbors who were more like family then those who live across the way...

We took this day even though our hearts are still filled with sadness because of our great lost.

We took the time to have a great many smiles, laughter, lots of hugs and kisses for each other...

lobster, salads and refreshments...

Dad arrived after a well deserved nap this afternoon...

Pat got dad some special beer ....

And through out the afternoon the seat next to him was never empty as each of us came by to talk a little... smile.. and of course what he loved the most our hugs and kisses....

And little Costa slept his way through the afternoon with all the activity going on....

And many stood by as yet another lot of lobsters were cooking....all waiting for that special announcement....

Hubert took over my job of taking the cooked lobster out of the pot to cool them down...

And finally all were cooked and the announce was almost made.....

Hubert cracked all the lobsters that went on the table... so no one had too much of a problem to eat....

And eating with one picnic table meant where ever you could find a place.....

And then there were those who couldn't eat these delicious little creations....

And others sat and waited for their turn at the table....

Or made their own table....

Danie stood with bottle in hand and thanked everyone that took part in making this afternoon the one it became...

And Like a true New Brunswick er... she took her toast...

he he ....

There are more photos... but the time is growing late... so tomorrow there will be more... especially photos of our two new addictions to our family...

To end this I would like to copy a poem that Lisette read in Mass yesterday....

The Dash

I read of a man who stood to speak

at the funeral of a friend.

He referred to the dates on her tombstone

from the beginning... to the end.

He noted that first came her date of birth

and spoke the following date with tears,

but he said what mattered most of all

was the "dash" between those years.

For that dash represents all the time

that she spent alive on earth ...

and now only those who loved her

know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not, how much we own;

the cars... the house... the cash,

what matters is how we live and love

and who we spend out "dash".

So think about this long and hard

are these things you'd like to change?

For you never know how much time is left,

that can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough

to consider what's true and real

and always try to understand

the way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger,

and show appreciation more

and love the people in our lives

like we've never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect,

and more often wear a smile...

remembering that this special "dash"

might only last a little while.

So, when your eulogy's being read

with your life's actions to rehash...

would you be proud to the things they say

about how you spent your "dash?

Candy, Glasse and Contacts... What a Mixture...

Last Tuesday when coming into the house I took my glasses out of my purse to find them in two... which is a major problem with me since I can't function without them... I knew that I had to go to my back up which was not very comforting because contacts and me have not really gotten along all that well... The longest I have been able to wear them was maybe 4 hours and out they came because of the itching and burning from them... I could walk around all day with my sunglasses but they were not for reading just driving...

For some strange reason the week before I made an appointment for a check up for my eyes and it was on Thursday.... well good news my eyes have gotten stronger not a lot but enough ... which also meant that the contacts that I was wearing were too strong as well.. .but I got through the days while waiting for the new contacts come in... and today was the day...My world for the last week has been a blur most of the time... I could drive but I had to be up close to read signs... I am thankful I didn't have to go out of town to a place I was not sure about ... then came the reading glasses since my contacts are only for distance... the ones that I had were too strong but nothing before or after that strength was looking any better... well this afternoon I went for my new contacts and all I can say not the new ones is OH MY GOD.... I can't believe how much of a blur I was in until now... I do need to go get new reading glasses tomorrow because I do believe these are too strong for me... but things without the reading glasses are so much more clearer... I actually went into the store on the way home to look around to read things off the shelf.. yes I know I am very strange at times....another strange thing this last week with the contacts is that I put them in, in the morning when I get up and don't remove them until bed... if I am in the wind I need to put drops but nothing else besides that... before this I would use almost a bottle in a few days of a few hours.. not sure what that is about but I am happy to say they are working out a lot better then I thought they would...I do missing watching TV until I go to sleep.. maybe that is good because I went back to reading...

On another topic I am a junk food junkie and for the last month or so I have been really bad... I have been giving in to the wants....which is really no good considering I am trying to lose weight....so Monday and Tuesday I was out shopping for Mom and Dad... and on my way home I have decided that Wal Mart is the worst place for people who doesn't want to be tempted... Whopper, strawberry marshmallow candy even the banana candy which is not always my favorite but will eat them if they are around... so with all the travelling around the last two days I patted myself on the back when I came home with two towels that were on sale instead of two large bags of candy... and spent the night saying why didn't I go looking for a small one instead... that wouldn't have been too bad... but this morning I was on the scale and seen that I had not lost or grained anything this week so I think even though I would have loved the strawberry candy to munch on while watching TV my reward was this morning...

Why this blog today... well I said to myself this morning that just the little things that we do in our lives can make or break things we are trying to do...but this afternoon as I was driving home looking at things in a totally new light with the new contacts I realized that my sight was so bloody important to me... I started thinking what the heck would I do without it... let a lone not being able to drive, but take photos would be out of the questions...see my wonderful grandson through the photos Robin post for me and so much more... After my eye appointment I stopped in to order new glasses and almost died when the total came up... that has changed today... these are things that I need to continue on with the life I lead... so no matter what the cost is at the moment may it be not getting my bag of candy I am still wanting ... or the cost of my glasses... somethings we can do without other things we can't ... I guess we just have to pick and choose which ones are more important in our lives...

Finally note I just downloaded a ton of photos of my sweet heart or as Robin calls him his trout... don't ask I didn't... so next one will be of my little Caleb... since I have been informed that some people have not seen photos of him since the baby shower...

Have a wonderful day all... Joanne

Mother's Day to my Mom

Wow sometimes I can really be silly or not think at all. Got a new computer and it took me until this morning to realize I can get to my blog through my account... When I came on here I had a comment waiting to be published... it made me go back to last year on Mother's day since I had no idea what I had wrote and of course being my father's daughter the tears are still with me as I write this blog... by the way Annie I am so glad you finally found my blog though I have not been writing all that much it in recently... welcome...



Each year for the last several years celebrated something here I also did it with as much energy as I could because I always believed that it could be the last year for it with mom and dad... little did I know last year when I did the blog it was actually the last year that we would be doing Mother's Day that it would be the last one that she would have remembered for a little bit.



Mother's Day is coming up this weekend and I am not even sure if I am going to take the time to do anything for it as mom doesn't even remember who I am or any of us are her children. Each time she is told that we are she looks with great surprise and then says... no she is not... she can't be... which is understandable because she also believes that Dad is her father at this time... Though I am thinking at the moment there is no use to doing anything it is still Mother's Day and even though she doesn't have a clue most of the time that I am her daughter she is still my mother.... Surprise Surprise Mom



So today this is for my mother who is here but not in so many ways....



For many years I didn't really know my mother... she was someone who cooked, cleaned, took care of all 7 of us...rarely did I see her smile or laugh... I knew that she loved us but very few times did she show it to us in the ways that I guess I needed to be shown... then May 26, 1997 she called to tell me that cancer entered our lives .... her hip had to be replaced. While she was in the hospital something that I had been waiting for, for many years happened .... I was 41 years old and I will never forget that evening for as long as I live... we were visiting her and as we were leaving she took her two hands placed them on each side of my face looked me straight in the eyes and announced in a very low voice that she loved me... it took me back because it was the first time that I could remember her ever saying these words to me... and I had been waiting for them for a long long time.... as she went through her treatment I watched on the side lines always being told that I had a family to look after and that would be the best way to help out... sorry guys but I really wanted to help my family or not this was my mom... but me being me stood on the side lines and watched as everyone else did what they had to do and I looked after my family...


That same year in November we lost Harold to an accident... she had just came back the day before from her last treatment.... the next morning I was at the house and once again those hands went to my face, her eyes looking into mine and she was once again willing to give herself up instead of Harold... Why him I have lived a good life? Was what she said to me... That was a moment of my heart being torn not sure if I would have wanted her out of my life but then I didn't want Harold gone either...


Then we found out that she had a tumor on her kidney and she choose not to do anything about it... they gave her 2 years... well people that was almost 5 years ago and she is still here... but through these years she has been faced with something worst then anything she had faced before (well in my eyes it is) the lost of her past and present.. not knowing who is who.. why things are happening... she is becoming more and more child like as each day goes by... she doesn't understand why she can't make herself understood to all that is in her life....

Most of my life I believed I didn't have a very strong relationship with my mother... but when I came back from Ontario and Roger needed to go back up North and asked me to stay here with mom and dad and I agreed to it. I didn't know that I was just keeping and eye out for them but it was the beginning of getting to know a woman that was in my life all my life for the first time in my life... I learned that she was very loving, caring and could be funny as heck... she had her moment like all of us but in the long run the woman I knew as my mother all my life was a heck of a lady as well... When things get rough and I come home at the end of the day... and I come to the computer to work on something useless my mind goes back to yesterday year and the times I have spent with mom cooking for Christmas or the summer visitors, our trips to the dollar store together or for a drive alone... our time spent waiting for appointments, our talks, hold her hand when she got nervous about what was going on with an appointment or just sitting out in the porch watching the birds and going ons in the neighbourhood... those are things that keep me going through even these days when I go up and sit with her to do her nails, or put cream on her feet because they are sore... these are things and times that will get me through the rougher days that I know that will be ahead... so on this note I will say A very Happy Mother's Day Mom... you are and will always be the best... Love Jo

Added Note
Though it was a busy day today with Mothers I had a mother moment as well that no gift will ever replace... Robin was up this weekend.. and we got to spend almost 3 hours together totally alone except for the dogs... and we sat at the kitchen table talked, laughed, and of course me being me had a few tears... it has been a long time since we had that much time for each other and I think no child could ever give a mother anything better then what he gave me tonight... his time and love... Thanks Hon.. Love you ...

I hope that all who are mothers that read this though it is late I wish the greatest Happy Mother's Day... other children are our greatest rewards in life even though at times we may think they can be the greats pains... but that is their jobs... and most of them do it very well...

Have a wonderful evening All I am going to bed Finally...

Another Loss In Our Lives

I know it has been a while but I have been very busy and part of it has left this world to join her son in the arms of the Lord.

Since December 2009 my mother in law Lois Hills has been in the hospital and on Saturday she closed her eyes for the last time on this earth and passed into another. So this week it has been a week of going here and there to help out with things for Thursday afternoon.

Today dad went to the dentist and got 3 teeth pulled out and I am feeling very guilty at the moment that I didn't call tonight to see how he was doing but getting photos scanned and then spending more time up at the H ills's getting things ready for Thursday actually took a little more time then I thought. Then I actually helped Matthew write something for Thursday as well and here is after midnight and I am still up and writing... First thing tomorrow morning when I get up I will be calling to find out how things are going with dad because I am sure that I am not going to get up there tomorrow.... I am promising myself that Friday will be my day off today but I am not actually counting on it... because looking for something to munch on tonight I found out there is eggs... no bread a little milk and not too much more... Matthew must think I have gone a little crazy having not all that much in the house... but I am sure he understands...

It is the same with Mr. and Mrs. Nickum... they must think that I have left the country because I have been there either this week. I promised Carl that I will try and stop by tomorrow morning after an appointment I have with a Tim's for his dad. Actually it is hearing aide day I have to get there tomorrow...hmmm I better make a note of that one so I pick up his stuff before going over...

There was a very bright light in my life this weekend... Master Caleb was down to the house and I got to spend sometime with him... I still thing all people who have blood pressure problems should spend time with a sweet heart like him... it takes so much of the pressure away...

Well it was just a note to say I am still alive... have a good one all... Joanne

5 AM Blogging

Tuesday morning and almost 5 am and I am up... someone not mentioning names but they know they are actually thought I was up at 2 am and wanted to have a chat... how silly can one be... now I am up and not able to sleep... makes for an interesting coming day....

So what has been going on since the last time I wrote... I guess lots. Maybe that is why I have not written... Dad is still in the hospital... didn't go up to see him today... actually I just thought of it I have not even called him... what a bad daughter I am... but then what else is new... lol which meant that I didn't go up to see Mrs. Hills, Carl's parents or Aunt... wow I am really bad... well there is always tomorrow...

This past weekend was my birthday... I spent the day cashing in my Christmas gift from Carl... a day at the Spa... so I have to say to anyone who is listening... anytime you want to send me back there just feel free to hand me a gift card for it... I am more then welling to use it... the only thing I can say is that the day was awesome... what a way to relax and forget your life even for just a little while...

I am still working on a blanket.. the baby is going to be here and it is not going to be there... have been working on a lot of other stuff when I am not out of the house... today was a re use thing for me kind of day... Susan, Carl's sister, just in case somebody didn't know or doesn't remember who she is, was getting ready of some curtains some time back and of course I took them thinking they would work in the bedroom but they were really long... but I put them up any way... so last week I took them down... washed them, cut and hemmed them... leaving me with quite of left overs... of course me being me didn't throw it out which was great in the end... now I hem with the no sew tape... I love the stuff... I have said thank you Flo for telling me about this stuff... amazing I have to say... any way so we moved some stuff again once again... the sitting room which was the dining room which was the bedroom is now a bedroom again and the living room is a living room again... so I thought of the left over curtains that I tucked away ... taking them out I discovered that they would be too short for the window.... threw them on the bed and when to do something else... but while I was do that I thought of something.. adding a piece to it... so when I got home from having lunch with Roger, Flo and Mom I got to it and now I have re used, done over curtains in the bedroom and I have to say I didn't do too bad of a job....

So the moving of the furniture from the basement to the ground floor made an extra room empty down there... so I decide to decided to make it into a craft room so that is what I have been spending my spare time with these last few days.... I just have to say I don't want to move in the near future there is way too much stuff in this house to move and pack...

Well that is it for now... I hope everything is good your way... and I really wish people stop leaving ad messages on this blog and of course people that think I don't sleep at all are the reason I am up at 5 am writing this blog... I do sleep....

Have a great one all... Joanne

Just a Few Things...

Well no one pictures of Caleb this week ... we have not had a chance to go down at all... it has been running to the hospital... actually that has been going on for a month now... with Carl's both parents in the hospital... the good news about all of it is that they finally put the two of them in the same room... the bad news is we don't see them coming home for a while...

Carl's vehicle went belly up last Monday... and it has not been fixed yet... we are waiting on it hoping that we get it by Friday since he is heading to Fredericton on Monday for 2 weeks of work... not sure what is going to happen if it is not fixed because this woman will not be without a car for any length of time...

I finally started my first scrap book for Caleb today... actually had time to do some printing out and work on the first page tonight while watching a movie... going to work on it again tomorrow morning... now I have to go through all those pictures I have and get some for the book this week...

I decided instead of sitting in the hospital room for 2 hours a day and do nothing so I have been working on a blanket while we sit around and talk... so I am about 1/2 way through it... so one of these days ... I will finally mail it out so Monique you may get it before the baby is born... well I am hoping any way...

We are finally got the puppies to sleep in their own beds that have been placed below our TV upstairs so we don't have to kennel them since they have been spending a lot of time in it with us out of the house a lot every day...

Well that is it for now... off to bed... have a good one all... Joanne

The Guest Of Honor at the Shower

Well it has been a while... but it has been busy but this past week we had Caleb's Baby Shower with the guest of honor present... and of course I took lots and lots of photos.... I think all of you are on Facebook so you have had a peck at what happened.... my photos would have been up sooner but I have been hunting for my cord for my camera to the computer which I have not found and then I thought I would use Carl's new computer and realized there was no program in it for me to edit... and also discovered that I have no idea how to work it as well... very simple woman here... well I then thought of the other one that is connected to the TV so we can watch movies off it... and finally got down stairs tonight to get them on my computer... what a process... while doing it I decided to show you another aspect of the shower... the Guest of Honor himself... so that is what is here and of course on facebook after I am finished here....

Between all the fun there had to be a time out for feeding... which mom got to do for a while any way...


Then Nanny got to do the burping... which she is good at... but was complaining about me taking so many photos of her... well Peggy as you can see I took you out of all those photos... he he

I just had to show everybody all the face Caleb can come out with while trying to burp...

And when he is fed and satisfied what does he do... sleep....

Then Sister Pat got a chance to hold him for a little bit...

And then Sharon's turn...

And then Ellen....

And then Lisa...

Of course you know I got the chance to do it as well... love having him in my arms...

And I have a thing about those little feet of his... just want to eat them up.....

I have always told Carl takes lots of photos because out of them there may be one or two that you actually like... well I got three this time... but then I also took over 200 photos that night....

The first one is of Nanny and Caleb... and the smile she came over her face... when she was holding him...

And then these two.... I just love them...
Those this one is the one I love the best...

Well that is it for now.. have a good one Nanna...